During each stage of my life, my eating habits have changed. From as young as I remember, food has been an important part of my life. Growing up, my mom was always in the kitchen cooking and baking, and she would let me help her. I was very young when I started helping my mom bake. We would make things like cookies and cakes, especially for birthdays or other special occasions. Though my mom enjoyed baking, she was also extremely self-conscious about her body. Unfortunately, this led to many complications in my own journey with food and health, which stemmed from my mother’s negative relationship with food and her own body. I too became obsessively self-conscious of my body image, which eventually led me to disordered eating in high school. To further complicate my situation, I found out in high school that I have food sensitivities to gluten and dairy, which greatly impacted my diet and lifestyle because I had to be pickier with what I ate. As an athlete, this was extremely dangerous because I wasn’t fueling my body correctly. I had to seek out help from a dietitian because my performance took a toll.
Another complication to my eating habits was attributed to my babysitter, who struggled with providing her own family with food. I experienced food insecurity, though not in my own household, but it still had a strong influence on how I view food, even to this day. My babysitter would not let us leave the table until we ate everything off our plates, which proved to be quite difficult for picky eaters. We were also told that we were ungrateful if we did not eat everything that was served to us. I did not want to seem ungrateful or disrespectful, so I cleaned my plate most of the time. Fortunately, I was not a picky eater, so there were not many times I was punished for not finishing my meal.
As one might expect, these factors, along with a multitude of others, contributed to how I view food and influenced my decision to become a dietitian myself. Thankfully, I no longer struggle with disordered eating but sometimes find myself a little too aware of the nutritional makeup of the foods I eat or make. I also still feel obligated to clean my plate, but it’s mostly out of convenience. I have to avoid gluten and dairy, which makes social settings extremely complicated and inconvenient. Having food sensitivities has many barriers to trying new foods, socializing, and even nutrition. However, I have learned to overcome these challenges. Nowadays, I can enjoy a variety of healthy (and some not-so-healthy) foods, and I love to connect with others through food.
Image from Amy Alpert Coaching